Archive for the 'sex' Category

Something strange is going on between vagina and cartoons. First these cartoon vibrators show up, now the “Boy And Girl Toy Series Vibrator” rears their reverberating heads.

What’s next? Looney Tunes? A Foghorn Leghorn dildo? Elmer Fudd? “Be very very quiet. I’m hunting poontang.”

[2dayblog]

Jamie Hewlett is the guy that illustrates for Gorillaz and he has created a set of six limited edition vibrators for JimmyJane.com. Each comes with a fancy case and a card that gives the back story of each character. If you want to get freaky with one of these pieces of “usable pop-art”, it will cost you $275.00 or $1650.00 for the whole set.

At that price, it’s like they’ve already screwed you.

On a side note. Ladies, please stop trying to replace the penis.

[Albotas]

Wow! An Artificial Virginity Hymen, for the ladies! Now you can let your man experience the first time again. Just insert this Artificial Virginity Hymen in your love hole, carefully, then it will expand a little and you will feel a little tight.

When penetration occurs, it will ooze out realistic blood.

Ok, even I’m like wtf?

[2dayblog]

Elizabeth Frisinger, 18, lost her virginity on the beach during a senior class trip. Don’t worry, I was gentle. Thing is, this dumbass freshly de-flowered airhead accidentally texted her dad, telling him about it.

Damn Lizzy. You have to be more careful. Anyhow it’s not cool to fuck and tell. This is what you get when you try to brag.

P.S. You weren’t that good. Next time try to do more then just lay there complaining about sand carbs in your ass.

[inquisitr]

Holy shit! Something just beat the Wii for strange gaming. No, that’s not a kitchen appliance. You put your penis in that. That’s the SOM, basically a hands free sex machine. Game developer Overflow has synchronized the “dream” device with its erotic game Cross Days.

The game’s website says the machine moves in real time to corresponding on screen motions during “climax scenes.” The SOM connects to the computer via USB. As the Cross Days website suggests, “Install SOM and experience a next-gen reality!” I’ll say.

Hit the link for some pics of the hand and dildo attachments. The Japanese are some pervy little people.

[Kotaku]

Here’s a great gift for Wii owners who like to combine gaming and sex. Just make sure you disinfect your Wii-board before you let someone borrow it. Looks like fun.

[about:blank]

Introducing Vagina Hero. My kinda game, since I’m a real life Vagina hero. Apparently this game teaches boys while playing video games. Which is noble. Educational games can be fun.

We all know what the girls are thinking anyways when they get all googily-faced over guitarists, even fake guitarists. Might as well stop faking the funk and try to teach them boys something useful. So sit back and indulge, as we transport you to an alternate reality where a publisher by the name of “Arctivision” gives birth to “Vagina Hero”.

Just like in Guitar Hero, you aren’t crap until you’ve rocked a real vagina.

[Ripten]

It would have been a whole different movie had Han Solo been put in one of these. Jabba would have been a butt-pirate and Slave Leia would have been completely willing to participate.

This Latex Vac-Bed is a bondage restraint that connects to a household vacuum cleaner. It immobilizes the individual between two layers of 14 gauge latex rubber by sucking out the air between the “sheets.” It will cost you pervs $640.

I’m assuming Bounty Huntrs will be using this until Carbonite freezing is a viable option.

[BB]

The video is NSFW because what we have here is some girl performing oral on a microphone. Yeah, I know, why waste such a gift on a mic. It’s part of a performance piece by artist Wojciech Kosma that has something to do with the acoustics of a mic when pleasured. More videos below.
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MyFace Condoms are custom condoms with your image printed on them. You can add your name and phone number if you like. It’s like a business card in that you will give it to someone, then that person may or may not get back to you, but if the do you’ll probably get f**ked. Just like in business.

Thing is, these are a bad idea. Let’s say I decide to bang some girl I shouldn’t be banging at someone else’s place where I should not be bringing girls to bang. Hey, it could happen. I do get a few hours to myself when not blogging about condoms and the like. Anyway, I open the condom, we do the nasty, she tells me that I’ve ruined her for all other men and we part company.

But I left the condom wrapper! Now they know my face. Now I have to explain to my grandmother why her hospital bed smells like sex, with my torn picture on the dresser.

[Nerve]