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Hugh Hefner’s new girlfriends Karissa Shannon and Kristina Shannon both have Florida police records! The 19 year-old twins who just moved into the Playboy Mansion, are both on probation for a battery arrest in St. Petersberg.

They were arrested in the early morning on Jan. 10 and booked on suspicion of felony aggravated battery, according to arrest reports. Both were released after posting $10,000 bonds. The twins were ordered to pay for restitution, and were given probation.

What does Hef care? I wouldn’t give a crap. Bad girls are hot in bed…Until they tie you down and steal all your shit so you gotta buy it back from ebay. But enough about my experience with the Olsen twins.

Hef says:

“They very much want to be girlfriends and now under the present circumstance, they probably will become my girlfriends,” Hef said yesterday.

Many Americans have been suckered in by the republicans plan to win by using Sarah Palin. Not me and not Matt Damon. Sad thing is this lesbian-looking idiot could become president should they win, since Mccain is a fossil. Here’s what Matt Damon has to say:

Hayden is looking as hot as ever. I’m hoping that this next season of heroes gives her some sexual superpowers, but until then here’s a promotional video she made for Candie’s. Make sure you have the kleenex box next to you before you watch it, cuz it’s probably good to rub one out. And that’s about all it’s good for. Mute the volume. That reminds me, I have to buy more Kleenex.

The new iPhone came out the other day. Sucks to be those stuck with the old iPhone and know that these other people are getting it for half of what you paid. Allegedly Paris is one such pissed off user. This skank allegedly had her people go to the Apple store for an upgrade on the iPhone she owned already. The apple store told her people to just go online to upgrade it using some “awesome” software.

So Paris went online to download it and it fucked up her iPhone. She called Apple bitching:

How could you do this to me?! I’m Paris Hilton!!! I’m like so important and get calls like all the f***ing time!!! I want a free f***ing phone!!! Get this shit fixed!

Awww. Too fucking bad.

Rod Stewart sucks at music these days, but he’s also busy sucking the tit of hid current blond model wife on his yacht. For some reason they didn’t take it indoors, preferring to show off said tit-sucking for everyone. Sad thing is, it looks like an old woman sucking a tit.

Britney Spears filmed a cameo for the new Pussycat Dolls video “When I Grow Up,”. Unfortunately for her, the part ended up on the cutting room floor. It was a case of them being hot and she being…not. Here’s the video.

Matt Damon is putting on some weight for a new movie, The informant. Is it a fat suit or did he really put on the pounds?

His proof of concept goes something like this. You dress the young child in his brand of special clothing… The clothing constricts around the small child, in all cases boys, and thanks to new clothing technology, immediately marches the frighteningly small and innocent child straight to Michael’s house.

[thehollywoodgossip]

Quick, act like a chicken, the paps won’t see you!

Jim Carrey, Jenny McCarthy, and Jenny’s autistic son Evan Asher were on Capitol Hill, Wednesday, actually doing something useful. The intent of the rally is to call for the elimination of toxins from children’s vaccines. Nice to see some Hollywood stars who are actually informed about the dangers of vaccines and who use their power for change. They wore shirts that read “Green Our Vaccines,” and held pictures of Evan as well. McCarthy, who has written a book about her experience raising an autistic son, has long believed his childhood immunizations triggered the condition. I’ll add that many studies support that. This pair wins the PopTherapy Sane celeb of the week award. Hollywood needs to take note and act more like these guys.

[Hotmamagossip]