Turn out lights. Grab your Penis flashlight and re-enact the famous duel between Darth vader and Luke Skywalker with your loved one. Then when you are all tuckered out from your freakish and perverse hobbies, put it in your night stand in case it’s needed.

If you hear something in the middle of the night, jump out of bed, illuminate your cock-saber and investigate. Should you encounter an intruder, he will be so scared seeing a glowing and illuminated cock that he will fly out the door quicker then Scooby and Shaggy in a haunted house.

On the off chance the intruder is for some reason, thrilled to see a huge glowing boner, just knock him out cold with a Penis to the head.

Security and protection all for $14.95. You can’t beat that with a…cock flashlight.

I want to order one as bait. I’m confident that if I mount this by the curb, it will attract every skank from their barstool, within a 5 mile radius. Sorta like the Bat-signal. I’ll let ya know.

[Nerd Approved]