Apparently Paris is working on a perpetual motion device that will rid the world of the need for oil. In her spare time, she’s been breeding bacterial cultures capable of curing everything from crabs to cancer. Oh, and she’s also found a way to get herself all kinds of fucked up by feeding herself alcohol via a hamster-cage watering device…

Of course Hayden may be biased. The 18-year-old Heroes star has been a close friend of Paris Hilton’s for several years.

“She’s a nice girl and a lot brighter than people give her credit (for) but no one sees her like that because she plays this character all the time.”

Oh right, the character… that character that gets wasted at nightclubs and offers to do everyone there. The one with the catchphrases and the look in her eyes that says, I’m just coasting through my day hoping I come off smart until it’s time to skank it up tonight.

The mythbusters just called me. They’re having all kinds of trouble disproving the myth that men have to tie a two by four beam to their ass so they don’t fall in.

Genius in a Forest Gump kind of way…maybe. But she’s no Einstein.

[Thehollywoodgossip]