Miley Cyrus is now selling herself to the highest bidder on ebay.

Already a prostitute!. Didn’t take long did it? Starting Tuesday her fans pedophiles will have the chance to win a date with her. I wonder just what that date includes and if it includes a free trip to the VD clinic.

Is there any parental supervision at all here? I’m not sure if these photos are real or not, but she’s acting like her usual skanky self. Remember she’s only 15. Some dude claims he hacked into her phone and got several nasty pics.

[Perezhilton]

Yeah that’s a real good idea Tyra. Except there’s already a show where whores sit around and talk about whoring it up. It was called Sex In The City.

Will all of you Hollywood A-holes stop using this young skank for your own purposes. At least let her get to 18 first.

Billy took his cowboy hat and boots to the Today show to try to promote his upcoming show
Nashville Star and talk about the fact that it will have 2 or 3 viewers. As usual he uses his daughter’s fame to promote his own show. When asked about his slut offspring daughter’s racy pics he said:

“I didn’t know they were going to strip her down and wrap her in a blanket,”

Whatever. That’s the same exact thing I said to the cops when they caught hauling livestock across state lines. You don’t want to know.

He basically said he’s ok with the whole thing. Billy Ray Cleetus is finding that it aint all easy since he packed up the truck and moved to Beverly. So he’s been banking on his daughter’s skanking.

The Miley Cyrus train wreck in the making just keeps on chugging. Now, she’s reportedly dating a much older man – a 22-year-old. Miley is only 15.

Normally, that would land a guy in jail, but rules are different in Hollywood. Famous jailbait apparently makes it alright. The pedophile in question, I mean, boyfriend, is her 22-year-old backup dancer, Marshall. The two have been caught flirting on camera and kissing and hugging each other. I wonder what Billy Ray thinks about this. It is perfectly acceptable in hillbilly law.

The little skank that could, Miley Cyrus, will appear in some racy (and some might say borderline kiddie porn) pics in Vanity Fair magazine. She’s only 15 years old! She posed for a shoot with photographer Annie Liebovitz.

Miley actually apologized to fans about the pics.

She says:

“I took part in a photo shoot that was supposed to be ‘artistic’ and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed.”

“I never intended for any of this to happen and I apologize to my fans who I care so deeply about.”

Vanity Fair says:

“Miley’s parents and/or minders were on the set all day. Since the photo was taken digitally, they saw it on the shoot and everyone thought it was a beautiful and natural portrait of Miley. In fact, when Bruce Handy interviewed Miley, he asked her about the photo and she was very cheerful about it and thought it was perfectly fine.”

Let me sum it up for you. Vanity Fair is wrong and so is Miley Cyrus.(Or they are both right, depending on your perspective.) What we have here are two A-hole entities who want to make money. They mutually needed each other to do so and they mutually agreed on these pics.

By generating controversy about the very pics they agreed to, Miley and her handlers get a ton of buzz. This equals more money in the well oiled 15 year old cash machine that is Miley Cyrus. It’s simple Hollywood math.

And so the die has been cast and the only thing left for them to do is sit back and watch the zombie population react exactly as they are supposed to. And count the money.

[Damnimcute]

She’s barely even had a life yet and uber-skank Miley Cyrus is cashing in on her fame to write books. She signed a seven-figure book deal with Disney Book Group, the teen star’s publisher announced Tuesday.

The book will focus on the 15-year-old’s road to fame, from growing up in Tennessee to becoming an international star. All I can say is that this kid is going to be pretty screwed up by the time she hits 18.

[People]

Im no fan of the jailbait celebuspawn of Billy Ray Cyrus, and apparently I’m not alone. A 16-year-old boy was arrested for planning to hijack a plane and crash it into a Hannah Montana concert.

Well, that’s a bit extreme.

The FBI said, “His stated intent was to hijack the airplane and commit suicide. He did indicate he intended to die in Louisiana. It appears he had a ticket to Louisiana.”

In his bag they found handcuffs, duct tape and yarn. Sounds like some sort of crafter with a kinky side if you ask me.

Now onto our second feature. Grab the popcorn and take a potty break. Are you back? Good.

The celebuspawn and Disney star had some racy pics leaked online. The 15-year-old is seen here in a provocative pose in her underwear.

Is that any way for a 15 year old to act? Billy Ray better adjust his mullet and keep a closer eye on this skank in training.

It must be something in the Disneyland water. Jesus.

[Damnimcute]