Here’s KK all dressed up as Wonder Woman for Halloween. When she lassos people with her lasso of truth, all they tell her is that her ass is fucking gargantuan. That’s her only power.

“Maam. Are you smuggling anything?”

Kim Kardashian was voted off Dancing with the Stars last night.

The elimination was a slight upset, because two couples scored lower than Kim and partner Mark Ballas this week, but I think they just figured that was too much ass on the dance floor.

The Laura’s Weight Loss site is using Kim Kardashian’s image on their site to promote some weight loss program? What is the program? Taking every inch of fat and jamming it in your dumper? I guess the regiment is to rest your ass on the couch, eat chocolate and ice cream and grow as if somebody’s shoving phone books under you.

Hey why not? If Heidi Montag can do it, so can a lobotomized monkey snorting crack.

Her thing can be putting the mic up to her gi-normous ass after a huge mexican meal, singing such hits as Chocolate Rain, or a sequel to Candle In The Wind titled “Blowing Out That Candle In The Wind With A Cartegory 5 Ass Hurricane”.

E! Online reports:

“I would be down, if it was something fun. I love music, so it would just have to be the right thing.”
If and when she pursues this, Kim has an all-star list of performers with whom she’d like to collaborate…
“I’d say a little bit Michael Jackson in there. I would love to work with, like, Timbaland as a producer and maybe Justin Timberlake.”

According to TMZ, the reality TV star severely cut her foot in her hotel room last night. Kim reportedly sliced her foot open on a glass coffee table and was rushed to New York Presbyterian Hospital. A source said there was “so much blood, it looked like a murder scene.” She seems fine now though as there are reports that she took her ass out for ice cream.

She’s going to be on this years Dancing with The Stars. I fedel sorry for whoever has to swing her and that big ass around.

I didn’t want to see that piece of crap Disaster Movie, but now I have to as there is apparently a cleavage-filled wrestling match. Two whores. No holds barred. Four tits enter. Two tits leave. Thunderdome bitches. Thunderdome is what I call Kim’s big ass by the way.

In 1980, a 14-year old Brooke Shields created controversy by posing for Calvin Klein. Now, Kim Kardashian has re-created that photo shoot for Radar magazine.

I hope they reinforced the ass seams after they worked her dumper inside with buttered knives and vaseline. Despite their best efforts, there was no way they could button her up in front.

Here’s Kim looking hot in a sexy navy uniform. My little soldier just saluted and shot off a round or two in honor of the occasion. You’ll notice that the anchors are on her tits, that way she can just drop anchor and let em all hang out when she’s on shore leave.

She performed with The Pussycat Dolls Friday night in Las Vegas, but who cares, we just like to see these pics.

“I love that I’m curvy, but I’m on this major kick to try and lose weight, especially in my butt,” the reality TV star and really rich individual told Radar magazine. “I’m just so over it! When you’re posing on the red carpet and the paparazzi shout, ‘Turn around! Turn around!’ — it gets a little offensive.”

Never fear. If she gets rid of her huge ass, we’ll talk about her tits.