Lindsay Lohan came out with her “6126″ line of leggings to honor legendary actress Marilyn Monroe, but the one kind seems to be made for blowjobs. The ones pictured on the left feature knee pads and are called “Mr. President” because Marilyn blew JFK.

That Lindsay sure is a class act. I’d like to see a demo of these leggings in action. The slogan should be, “These leggings protect your knees, not your tonsils.”

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The story goes like this. When Michael and Dina Lohan were separated in 1995, Michael was off humping everything that moved.

Michael has admitted to the affair with Ashley’s mother Kristi Kaufmann and thus, Ashley was born.

Now, Michael has said recently that Ashley does bare a little bit of a resemblance to Lindsay. Now, since Kristi has gone public, even saying that Michael hasn’t paid any child support, Michael has decided to take a paternity test.

Have you seen Michael Lohan? Why are women fucking this guy?

Here’s Lindsay Lohan, the face(body) of the 2008 UK Visa Swap which has something to do with Europeans swapping used clothes for charity. Linsay will do almost anything, but at least this one’s for charity.

[Vista Swap]

You and everybody else dude. I thought I did too, until her voice changed and I noticed her bulging muscles and adams apple. But I don’t talk about that, except when I cry late at night.

So Bobby Brown’s son Brandon is claiming he had sex with Lindsay Lohan in a bathroom. The Sun:

He boasts: “Me and Lindsay got really, really close. She followed me to the bathroom during a private party, and, well, we basically got together. I think she knew who I was when she first saw me. We were just staring at each other and she walked by. I walked into the bathroom and she followed me in.”

“I think she knew who I was when she first saw me.” I was buying it up until that point. I just wrote your name and I still don’t know who the hell you are. I remember something about your mom being on crack and your dad writing a ghostbusters song, but you don’t ring any bells. Sorry.

[The Sun]

The latest data availability initiative on MySpace that allows people to share profile information with other websites has a problem. Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan’s private photos have been accessed, and Myspace had to disable the feature until the issue is fixed.

No lesbo pictures or sex acts unfortunately.

[Valleywag]

New movie offers keep pouring in for Lindsay Lohan. Last month she accepted a part in the upcoming “Manson Girls,” where she’ll play one of Charles Manson’s devoted followers. Now she’s agreed to shed her clothes for a role in a low-budget film.

The role? Straight out of my dreams. She’ll play a “nymphomaniac waitress” in “Florence”. Apparently, the producers requested a topless sex scene. She countered with “full frontal”. Nice… I love a girl who is committed to her craft.

If you’ll notice her skirt, it says 1 hour parking by permit only. I’m pretty sure that many dudes have parked their wang up her skirt and for more then an hour at a time, so I aint buying the fact that she requires a permit.

[MSNBC]

Lindsay Lohan and Sarah Jessica Parker are proud new members in the Pipedream Products line of inflatable toys. I’m pretty sure neither one endorses this product.

My favorite part is the packaging. “Sarah Jessica PorkHER Loves Sex In Her Shitty”. That my friends is class.

Among other things, the Lindsay Fully Loaded Love Doll reads, “Put your dick in drive and take Lindsay for a spin….”

They’ve actually got a bunch of stars, but these have the funniest packaging.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, “What kind of guy fucks a plastic doll?” Oh yeah, Pam Anderson’s current boyfriend.

[Pipedream Products]

I must be a well-loved carpenter out of work, because I keep getting wood from unexpected sources. Case in point, these Lindsay Lohan Nude photos where she tries to look like Marilyn. I’m not all that into Lindsay, but I admit there’s something sexy about some of these shots. Not the one above though, that weird thing she’s doing with her mouth ruins it.

The story goes like this: In 1962, photographer Bert Stern shot some Marilyn Monroe pictures at the Hotel Bel-Air that have become known as “The Last Sitting.”

Now 46 years later and New York Magazine has attempted to duplicate this montage with Lohan. Why? Who the hell knows. I guess we gotta get somebodt nude and in a Marilyn wig. They both like/liked sex a whole lot, I hear they are both easy, and of course both really like a good drug.

Is that a tattoo on Lindsay’s ass, or the photograher’s handprint? Could be a permanent slap imprint from several guys taking the reigns and urging her onward.

Click through for more pics.
(more…)

No, not for punishment for making horrible movies. Judging by some of those movies, some might say she’s been in and out of morgues for years. This is punishment for drunk driving.

The 21-year-old actress will be working at a morgue as part of her punishment for misdemeanor drunken driving. She has already spent two months in rehab and has done her share of community service. Now she will see dead people.

Two four-hour days at the morgue are part of a court-ordered program to show drivers the real-life consequences of drinking and driving. She may also spend two days working in a hospital emergency room.

Awesome idea. This should get it through those thick Hollywood heads that it is no game. Real people can be killed by their lack of common sense.

[AOL]