This thing looks like a half-eaten zombie meal. I call the heart. If I saw people eating this thing with their bare hands all savage-like, I would immediately whip out my shotgun and deliver them into the next world with some head-shots. Then I would take some green herbs and replenish my health, check my inventory and finish my real life Resident Evil game by running away from the cops.

[Theyrecoming]

Ever wanted to open a beer bottle with your ass crack? Or with someone else’s? Sadly it only leads to a torn rectum, with none of the fun usually associated with torn rectums. The Crack It Open wall mounted ass bottle opener will give you a rectum to open your beer. Isn’t that much better then a hospital visit?

[Nerd Approved]