In May, Paul Newman pulled out of plans to direct a play for his Connecticut theater company citing health reasons.

No info was given by his publicist, which has only led to plenty of reports of what is ailing the Oscar-winning actor. Cancer seems to be the rumor.

The Daily Star reports that Newman is under the care of an oncologist at New York’s Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center for lung cancer.

The National Enquirer also reported that Newman has cancer. Whatever the case, we wish him well. They don’t make em like Newman anymore.

[Dailystar]

It’s a morbid question, but reasonable to ask. As a celebrity’s bad behavior escalates, so do the odds that they will exit this world in some bizarre fashion of their own making.

In other words, a coked up skank or beaver-flashing pop princess is bound to go down the wrong path and complete their downward spiral in a dramatic way.

Thanks to a website, if you can guess their demise, you will win a PS3 or an Ipod. The web site is called Mr or Mrs Death, and has more than 25,000 participants.

Pretty morbid to think that you can win cool stuff just because the Grim Reaper comes for some famous loser. Then again, it’s their own bad behavior.

Me, I’m betting on some other stuff.

For instance, in 2009 Paris will be knocked up by an entire nightclub. Paternity testing will reveal that they are all in fact the father. Maury Povich will out the fathers on TV. This child, endowed with it’s multi-father genes, will spend it’s whole life trying to crawl back in her hole, thereby recreating the night of it’s conception. It will have to be put down one starry Hollywood night by sharp shooters when it becomes clear that it’s bogarting of Paris’ twat has shifted the balance of power in the town.

I might be a little off on the date…

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